Here’s my take on current events this week… in two sent(ence)s.
Gwynnie P Is The Most Beautiful Person… According To People Magazine
Yeah her bod’s sick, but she’s not likeable. I find her to be an odd choice, considering I haven’t seen her on anything since Glee… Hillary Clinton was totally robbed.
Rob Kardashian’s Disappearing Act
If you’re going to have a breakdown, don’t do it on air with Ryan Seacrest (no matter what Mommy says). When too much pizza has caused your package to shrink, it’s time for a cleanse hunty.
Buckwild Stars Sex Tape Ordered To Be Destroyed
What the hell West Virginia, why would you destroy this gem? Nothing sounds hotter to me than “redneck sex”, and that Jessie (yes, that’s the correct spelling) Johnson is such a hunk.
Marky Mark’s Willing To Reunite With The Funky Bunch, For Boston
I’m getting really good vibrations about this. I can only pray for the Funky Bunch and Boston to cooperate, J’adore Marky Mark.
Billy Ray’s New Look
Billy Ray, the Bieber was sooo 4 years ago… but it’s werqin for you. Maybe next time you can go a few inches shorter, you’re more into your hair than Uncle Jesse.
J Love’s Daytime TV Cleave
Can I get a dicky up in here? But seriously, her
breasts weave is perfection.
I was fairly bored with the news this week, hopefully Amanda Bynes will do something silly next week.